Seven Things "Good Parents Do"...
That mess up their children for life:
#7. Giving Your Kids a Creative NameThe rest here.
...You have just sent your flesh and blood straight into the middle of a massive man-rape in the prison shower. According to a study at the Shippensburg University, kids growing up with ordinary, popular names have a higher chance to become law abiding citizens, while all the unusually named ones should start deciding what state they want to commit their first felony in (friendly tip, skip Texas).